Why We Chase

If you were fortunate enough to be a part of a church that participated in the "one prayer" series this year you were truly blessed.  One of the speakers was Pastor Craig Groeschel of lifechurch.tv fame and in my opinion one of the most relevant teachers of this generation.  He spoke on unstoppable courage, which I'm not even going lie to you I don't remember 90% of his lesson.  What struck my very core was a tiny snippet of information that has forever changed the way I look at life.

2 Samuel 23:20-22

 ²⁰ Benaiah son of Jehoiada was a valiant fighter from Kabzeel, who performed great exploits. He struck down two of Moab's best men. He also went down into a pit on a snowy day and killed a lion. ²¹ And he struck down a huge Egyptian. Although the Egyptian had a spear in his hand, Benaiah went against him with a club. He snatched the spear from the Egyptian's hand and killed him with his own spear. ²²

Ummm.  That doesn't make sense.  How is this relevant?  This is just describing some guy in a long list of guys that were good fighters and killed lots of men.   Are you going to try to kill 3oo men with their own swords......'caaaaaause I don't think that's a good idea for ya there "Rambo".

No. It's the state of mind I have adopted.  Benaiah wasn't attacked by this lion, he wasn't protecting a little girl. He simply had the unstoppable courage to follow this lion into pit, while it was snowing, and killed it.  CRAZY.

People with real faith chase lions.  Our spiritual enemy roars around us trying to devour us and we run around fretting and worrying and praying for God to help us while this "lion" grows in strength and size.  The problem is people tend to look at how big the lion is instead of how big God is or that God will help you, and Mike, and Sara but not me.

People who chase lions don't let their fears stop them from doing what God has called them to do.  "Normal" people don't chase lions, they rarely live by faith, they always have excuses as why they cant' follow their dreams.  Normal people live with regrets.  We don't.  Why?Well..WE CHASE.

Let's turn back the clock to spring of 2009 for a while here. Cue the Wayne's World 'doodly doodly doodly doodly' music.

We are living in Owasso-OK, we have good* jobs, we were in the process of having our new property being built and being promoted, we ride scooters all over Tulsa county, we have FINALLY found a great chuch at AWFC after searching for nearly 4 years.  Life is good.

We have some friends that are leaving our hometown of Weatherford to plant a church in some town in Texas that we've have never heard of, so we decide to go see them off on their last Sunday in Weatherford.  

Well...A funny thing happend on the way to church today.  I sat their during the service and was certain I was supposed to go to this town in Texas that I had never heard of.  But God, we're getting promoted, everything is going so great right now.  Are you sure?  Little did I know, that Elizabeth was having the same conversation with God.  When we finally talked to each other about what we were feeling, we came to the conclusion that we WOULD go to Texas and be a part of this church, BUUUUUUUUT in a few years after we had made our millions and yada yada yada.  We were comfortable with this decision, and it felt right.  God agreed.....or so it seemed at the time.

Now fast forward a few months.  We've been promoted to out brand new property .We have moved into our new place and IT IS SWEET.  3 bed 3 bath ,a 400sq ft balcony over looking a pond. We have an amazing staff at work, we still love our church.  Life is now great.   Oh, Here comes the offspeed pitch. 

STRIKE 1.   We're Pregnant!!!  Couple of hours and beers later.  This is Awesome. I'm stoked.

STRIKE 2.   You know those insurance premiums you've been paying, weeeeell that didn't specifically didn't cover maternity so now were not even going to cover you or the baby.  (Don't get me started on insurance companies)  Ok, we have our savings account we will just pay for it somehow.

It was at this time that I started thinking maybe we should look at moving to Texas a little sooner, like maybe now.  It took some convincing on both of our parts to get us out of our comfort of having jobs and a place to live to commit and say "We're moving to TX"  We started looking for and applying to hundreds of jobs using our last vacation days to drive to Dallas and interview for positions.   Nothing.   By this time it was September and I was restless and had it stuck in my head that we should just quit our jobs and move without any job prospects.  I convinced Elizabeth, we put in our notices and she got a job the next day.  Oh and they would cover her maternity on insurance plus pay her during her maternity leave.  Long story, short...I found a job,  Beckett Hawk was born(he is so much fun), we bought a house(with a pool).  Life is GREAT again.  

But yet, I've grown restless again.  I chased my lion and came here to be a part of something important-something life changing, but I'm not pulling my weight and to Solomon's Porch I apologize for that.  I've been acting 'normal', I haven't used my gifts and knowledge to it fullest potential, I haven't been chasing lions.  I've sat back and watched from the outskirts and done what was needed but not anything more. I haven't been held accountable, not for my actions but my inactions.  This will change. 

Sometimes in order to chase your lion, you have to sacrifice other things in life as well. This applies to real world situations as well as the spiritual.  We have wanted to start our own business for a couple of years now.  It keeps getting put off because the money and timing just hasn't been there.  Now, we know how to chase--with our whole heart and not look at the size of the lion but rather at the size of our God and we have been able to drastically reduce to amount of time until we are able to fund our startup.

The path to your greatest potential is often straight through your biggest fear.

2 Timothy 1:7

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

Love is.....

 ⁴ Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud ⁵ or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. ⁶ It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. ⁷ Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 1 cor 13

How many times have you heard this in your lifetime?   There have been countless sermons and weddings proclaiming these Words, but how many times have we let it actually sink in on what is being taught here.

In the three verses before this it basically sums up as saying that you can speak in all the tongues of the earth and angels, prophesy and understand all of God's secret plans and possess all knowledge, have faith that can remove any mountain, give every thing you have to the poor and even sacrifice your own body, but if you do NOT possess love.........you have NOTHING.   

 

WOW.   Nothing...Really, but I can do all these great and amazing works of God.   Yes... Really you have nothing.

Most of us can honestly say "Weeeeeeell, that's not talking about me. I love people.  I'm friendly, I go out of the way to help people, I yada yada yada"  According to webster you are absolutely correct in that thinking.

How many of us can look at verse 4-7 in the first paragraph above and put a checkmark next to each one of the attributes of love.  You can skate by with only a few and live our lives just fine, but to truly experience all aspects of God's love for us we should be able to fulfill the entire definition that the Word of God plainly sets out for us in this overused and under emphasized passage.  I easily can say that I have failed with a few of these.

Love is patient, Love is kind.  I'm a kind person, I feel like I have fairly good patience.  Wait, scratch that thought, I commute in Dallas traffic every day, but I am getting better.  If only "that guy" would quit changing lanes so many times.  I mean really if we were going to the same place you would only beat me there by maybe 43 seconds. Really Seth, Really.

Love is not irritable.  ME IRRITABLE?  Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. I'll leave that there for now. HAHA

Here is the one that hits me in the face.  Love does not keep records of being wronged. You mean holding grudges is bad.  If you know me very well at all you know I'm a pretty happy go lucky guy. I am laid back, easy going and for the most part I am always looking at the positive side of things.  I tend to not let things bother me, but i have my triggers. When those triggers go off, I ache with resentment and anger towards people that I feel I have been wronged by. I have at times worked myself into a frenzy for sometimes days just festering with this.

I once had a friend/coworker who lied to me and stole from me.  He put my wife and I through so much that I wanted to kill him.  Literally.  I hadn't planned it that way.  I had a gun in my car and I was in his neighborhood.  The thought just kind of occurred, "Here's the perfect opportunity since you're here and all-just go over there an maybe scare him a little." That's F-ing crazy for me, even now, to sit here and recollect these events.  I sat there in walmart parking lot with my wife waiting on one our other friends to get off work while I contemplated killing a man.  It seriously gives me chills right now.  I remember talking with her but I was not involved in the conversations.  I was having my own in my head.  A song came on the radio, and for the life of me I wish I could remember what it was but I can't.  It was a David Crowder song and it softened my heart, it literally may have saved a man's life.  I don't think I could kill someone, EVER, but that night I was different.  

I am much better since that time(I haven't tried to stab anyone) but there are still several small and a couple of big things that I get riled up about. Today, June 27th I have decided to let go.  I have compiled a list of names of people that I haven't spoken to in years in some cases that I need to reconcile with and be done with the hurt, the pain,the anguish forever.  The list includes some family members, coworkers, an x-girlfriend, and my father, whom I have NEVER spoken to.

This is going to be the hardest thing I have ever done , but as a father myself I can't continue and raise my son into what he needs to be, when I have unreconciled grievances that keep me from showing the love outlined so clearly in 1 Corinthians.

¹ Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I have become sounding brass or a clanging cymbal. ² And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. ³ And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, but have not love, it profits me nothing.

⁴ Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud ⁵ or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. ⁶ It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. ⁷ Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance. 

⁸ Love never fails. But whether there are prophecies, they will fail; whether there are tongues, they will cease; whether there is knowledge, it will vanish away. ⁹ For we know in part and we prophesy in part. ¹⁰ But when that which is perfect has come, then that which is in part will be done away. 

¹¹ When I was a child, I spoke as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child; but when I became a man, I put away childish things. ¹² For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part, but then I shall know just as I also am known. 
¹³ And now abide faith, hope, love, these three; but the greatest of these is love.